And Then I Didn’t Care

I had been chalking up my growing contempt for a certain group of people to the fact that I’ve turned 50.

I am absolutely convinced that scientific evidence will soon prove that 50 is the maximum number of years the average human can tolerate difficult people.

I’m not talking about people with personalities or self-serving behavior. They’ve always rubbed me the wrong way, and I learned to deal with them decades ago –  even when that made my life more difficult.

I’ve never been particularly good at being deferential to people whose primary goal is to feel important, powerful, or special at the expense of others.

I’ve written about people who use religion as an excuse for intolerance and discrimination.

I’ve called out business owners who believe excessive personal profits are more important than ensuring their employees earn enough to pay their essential bills or can easily be fired when profits are down.

And I’ve never hesitated to point out how many people use the privilege of voting and the political system to pursue personal gain rather than the common good.

But I’ve come to realize that such individuals are simply doing what other people allow them to do.

And I can’t stand it any longer.

For 50 years, they almost had me convinced that there was something wrong with me – that, in my own way,  I too was intolerant and, like they, should:

  • Understand that the southern guy who displays the confederate flag just has a different perspective;
  • Realize that employers aren’t in business to take care of people but to make as much money as they can;
  • Expect the old white guy to be clueless about how his words and attitude are offensive.
  • Know that some people must cling to the belief that their religion is THE religion because that’s what they’ve been taught.

And then I turned 50, and I realized that there is absolutely nothing wrong with my intolerance of such beliefs and behaviors. Calling out people who is exhibit them is important, but calling out the people who stay silent in such matters is the only way the world will change

I turned 50, and I won’t let people let me think I’m not tolerant about their desire not to “get involved.” Instead, I’m going to let them know that if they aren’t part of the solution, they are part of the problem.

I turned 50, and I decided that no one’s opinion about how I choose to address problematic people matters.

I turned 50… and then I just didn’t care.

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About Trina Bartlett

I live in the Eastern Panhandle of WV, with one dog, two cats, a daughter in high school, a son starting his latest adventures at West Virginia University and a husband who works strange hours. When I'm not working as a director at a nonprofit social service organization or being a mom, I can generally be found riding my bike, walking my dog and stirring things up.

Posted on July 9, 2017, in current affairs, My life, people, perspective and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. You’re absolutely right. I find my supply of tolerance is running out as I get older. We can just look away and pretend everything’s fine for just so long. I believe most of my tolerance supply was drained on Nov 8, 2016.

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